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Old May 28th, 2009, 04:29 PM
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Re: Waiting for the other shoe to drop

Uuuuuummmmmmmmm...

*The following is my opinion only, and said with much, much caring about snafu*

Okay.. honestly? I think it's great that you got that all out on paper. Keep fine tuning it, and then burn it.

I know this'll shock you to "hear" me say...

Win or lose, when you fight with skunks you end up stinking.



IMO there's no way that letter will be received well. Your intentions are good, snafu, so I'm not faulting you for them AT ALL. I understand that you want someone to point at the big pink elephant in the room and say "LOOK!" I really get it. I spent 30-some-odd years feeling that way about my sisters.

IMO that letter will make your sister even more defensive. Possibly you are hoping for some remorse from your sister? BTDT... it ain't gonna happen.

Sometimes posters, talking about cutoff, will say that the best way to achieve it is to just do it. Don't make a big announcement "I'm CUTTING YOU OFF"... just slowly fade from sight. IMO, that's how you ought to handle this situation. (and this is just IMO, so take from it what you will) Instead of making it a proclamation that from now on, such-and-such will happen... just have it happen from now on.

snafu, you're doing a good thing and IMO you're a good, well-intentioned person. You have a big heart and want to solve people's problems for them, or at least help. That's a great way to be, but I'm a little worried that you'll get burned trying to help someone who doesn't think they have a problem.
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