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Old December 27th, 2017, 05:56 PM
Ohmysoul1234 Ohmysoul1234 is offline
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Re: I can’t stand my mom. Help.

Originally Posted by KayKay View Post
What options do you have?

The ones I come up with are:
- send her back (would she have to live with your dad?)
- have her move out to a small place nearby where she can still help with childcare but she won't be living with you
- help her get a job so she can become independent
- the two of you come up with household rules so that neither of you get angry

Do you think she'd be willing to go see a counselor? Honestly, she sounds like she's a little lost. She may be trying to control you in an effort to still feel needed and useful. Those are her issues to work through, but in the meantime she is hurting your relationship with her.
Thanks for the reply! You are right I think she’s lost and she’s been lost for so long in an abusive relationship with my dad I don’t think she can think right. On top of that her personality just makes it worse. She thinks that she’s really a “good person” because she endured all the abuse from my dad it’s like sort of a crown for her which is so wrong. But anyways, I think sending her back would be the best choice and even though she doesn’t have to live with him, I think she would always fear that he might find her and do something bad to her so it’s still not an easy situation for her. Her getting a job here or being on her own.. I really don’t think she’s willing to.. she is so dependent on me and passive she won’t even get out of the house to make friends or anything. Okay, she doesn't really speak English so it would be hard for her to get a job but I at least wanted her to make friends from her country here because they have their churches and communities and stuff but she’s just not willing to.. she now just started going to walmart on her own after 2 years she’s been here. It’s really like I have another child but that child is controlling me as well... she also doesn’t think having issues with me is a serious problem.. and doesn’t realize how much she’s hurting me. I’m just going to have to send her back but I want her to understand the situation.. it’s not because I hate her for no reason.. but yea it’s hard 😭

Last edited by Ohmysoul1234; December 27th, 2017 at 06:01 PM.
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