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Old September 2nd, 2017, 07:58 AM
summeron summeron is offline
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Parents Money and brother

Had a rough relationship growing up with my parents. 12 years ago I stopped talking to my parents (at age 24). My brother who was always on very good terms with my parents has continued having a good relationship with them. I stopped talking to him too back then, 12 years ago.

Last year I decided to contact my brother. Even though I always felt a little bitter that he didn't stand up for me more against our parents I felt that if I was ever going to get to know him and his children the time was now. We've become good friends and I now know his family (wife and two children).

My father owns a real estate business and my folks also own some private property. A few days ago in a telephone conversation with my brother, at the end of the conversation, he said there was something he had been meaning to talk to me about but didn't know how to bring up. He told me that my father had transferred 70 % of the real estate business to him (my brother) and that he saw income from that now. I mean I realized that he was getting money somehow since he recently quit his job and now only works two days of the week, has a wife who doesn't work, has two spoiled kids, can afford two cars and recently built his family a new house in a nice area of the city.

My brother said that the betrayal would have been worse if he had never said anything to me, that he felt real sad about this as this affects his relationship with me as well as with his (our) parents.

I can't blame him for taking the money and I'm grateful he told me and I think it's beautiful that he feels bad about this whole thing. Though thinking about this a few days now I can't help to think that this will indeed affect our relationship. I have a job and a decent salary. I'm nowhere near rich. I rent my apartment and I have an old car. My brother tells me that our father says that there is money put away for me (for the day when they die) but he won't talk about it and he's apparently not prepared to let me have any of it or any interest from the capital. Well, right now I'm just sad about all of this. This money would mean that I would be able to live a different life. I would be able to buy myself a nice house, things I want but can't afford and I probably wouldnt have to worry about money again. I'm 36 years old and I am now in a time in my life when I need that money. It's very frustrating to know that if I ever get any money it will be maybe when I'm in my 60s (and also it won't be what my brother got since he's seeing returns from the real estate business now). My brother has gotten the idea that there is money in an account reserved for me but I sort of doubt that that kind of money is put away in an account, seems unlikely to me.

I can't help to think: My brother can solve this for both of us. He can give me half of what he got, right here and right now.

I suspect his wife wouldn't be too much into that. Also he has kids and I suppose he has to think about them as well, even though I think there's probably enough for all of us.

By the way, inheritence law where I live dictate that children must inherit no less than 50 % of the estate. In this case that means that I as one child of two am legaly entitled to 25 % of the estate (my father can will 75 % to one child and 25 % to the other if he would want to.)

The irony of this is, my father is a lawyer specialized in inheritence law. Growing up I always heard him talk about how many times he had seen families torn apart because of money coming between parents and their children, and between siblings at inheritence time. Indeed my own father was disowned (as the only child!) but managed to reach a settlement with my grandmother (30 years ago).
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brother, estate, inheritence, money, parents

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