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Old December 11th, 2016, 05:17 PM
johnyhaw johnyhaw is offline
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Unhappy I can`t believe my dad did this!! Help! I am gonna get crazy

Hello,
My name is John. I am 23 years old and I am going through an unenviable situation. I sincerely hope that I will get your advices, because I hardly manage to control myself and not to take actions….
My problem is very, very complicated, that I doubt someone has encountered something similar. I don`t even know how to start. It all happened 9 years ago. I was living with my mother, my father and my 8 years older brother. In that period, my brother had a girlfriend that is his wife now. It all seemed to be great. One day, my parents decided to spend a weekend out of town together with my brother and his girlfriend. My dad had an excuse that I have to study, so I stayed in my grandmother`s house. I was really mad they went on a weekend without me. When they came back, I heard the worst news any kid could hear…Mom and dad were getting divorced. I was just shocked. Couldn`t believe that my family will no longer be together, and none of them wanted to explain why…
Few days ago, I was looking for a movie to watch in my dad`s collection and unexpectedly I found a CD named ‘’Weekend PRIVATE’’ . With no reservation, I wanted to see what was on it, because it seemed to be lot older disk and the title made me think that I will find the answer…I was right….
After I watched the video, I was astonished. I am shaking now as I am writing this. It was a video that my father had recorded on that ******g weekend. My mother was laying on the floor under my brother`s girlfriend ( current wife ). Desperately trying to get up but unsuccesfully, they all laughted at her, I mean ALL : My dad, my brother , his gf. All the time they were saying: ‘’Come on, you lost, you will do whatever she says…Come on, lick it , come on..’’ I couldn`t figure out what did she lose, and what did she have to lick. According to the conversation, mom had lost some kind of a bet. My brother`s girlfriend who was sitting on top of mom, took of her high heels, caught mom`s arms with her hands and put her feet on my mother`s face. ‘’ Ha-Ha-Ha, open your mouth, lick it’’ they laughted at mom. I just stayed frozen. They wanted mom to lick my brother`s gf`s feet. WHAT????
She resisted to open her mouth, so my dad decided to interfere. He gave the camera to my brother and smothered my mom`s nose. It`s all recorded. He smothered mom`s nose, she had a difficulty to breathe and she opened her mouth. My dad and brother were laughting as crazy, while his girlfriend placed her feet in my mother`s mouth. Mom almost cried, and so did I when I saw what have they done to her. That`s why mom didn`t come to their wedding, that`s why I could never explain the unusual relation between my dad, my brother and my sister in law. I AM ASHAMED OF MY FAMILY.
I HAVE A FEELING THAT I COULD KILL SOMEONE, please I will be gratefull to hear some advices, before it`s too late….What to do ? Should I talk to my mother? Should I ask an explanation or simply to give them what they really deserve???
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Old December 11th, 2016, 06:13 PM
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KayKay KayKay is offline
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Re: I can`t believe my dad did this!! Help! I am gonna get crazy

I think that you should not have watched the video. Your mother, father, brother and his now-wife never told you what happened because they didn't want you to know.

Your mother was humiliated, and now her humiliation is complete with your knowledge of the situation.

Drop it. Pretend you don't know. What you saw was cruel and abusive, made worse by the fact that your father recorded and kept it. But the fact that you saw it was a huge violation of your mother's privacy as well.

I'd be willing to guess it wasn't the first time your father humiliated your mother.
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Old December 12th, 2016, 03:45 AM
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Re: I can`t believe my dad did this!! Help! I am gonna get crazy

That's not good. It would really hurt your mother to know that you have seen that video. I realize it's not going to make you feel any better, but don't let one that you know. It sucks, but that's the way it is - it's just going to be something that sucks in your life. Everyone has something in their life that sucks. We just learn how to live with it - it's called "skeletons in the closet."

Now you know why your parents are getting divorced. Personally... I don't blame your mother for divorcing her husband. As has been said - it' probably not the first time.

Sorry for your situation, but don't physically hurt anyone. That would make you no better than them.
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Old December 12th, 2016, 04:35 AM
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Annsdil Annsdil is offline
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Re: I can`t believe my dad did this!! Help! I am gonna get crazy

You were kept out of it for a reason. Your mother probably wanted to protect you as well as try and preserve her pride. Just know that by getting a divorce, your mother took a good course of action and she is very strong to take such a stand. She has stood up for herself.

The best thing you can do is respect her privacy and respect her as a person and your mother and be proud of her for getting out of this abuse and just support her in what she chooses to do.
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Old December 12th, 2016, 05:46 AM
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LucyVanPelt LucyVanPelt is offline
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Re: I can`t believe my dad did this!! Help! I am gonna get crazy

I am so sorry that you saw this. You should not have watched that video. I'm so glad that it wasn't something worse. I'd hate for that image to be stuck in your head forever.

I am going to give you bad advice, but I know it is what I would do.

Take that DVD, smash it into a million pieces so that it can never be viewed again. It isn't your property, but I wouldn't allow anyone to keep that "trophy." The only caveat would be if there were something else that would be considered evidence on it. Then I'd take it and either turn it over to authorities or put it in a safe place should it be needed in the future.

Be gentle with your mother. Keep your distance from your father, brother, and his wife. Bullies like that will look for another target.

You're a good son. Your mother is lucky to have you.
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Old December 13th, 2016, 01:08 AM
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Re: I can`t believe my dad did this!! Help! I am gonna get crazy

Quote:
Originally Posted by LucyVanPelt View Post
You're a good son. Your mother is lucky to have you.
Yes, he is.
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