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Old September 23rd, 2013, 06:24 PM
ConcernedOne25 ConcernedOne25 is offline
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Unhappy Husband verbally abusive?!

My husband of 6 years has been extremely mean to my 2 year old son. Calling him stupid, pussy, *****, idiot, wimp,ect. I tell him time and time again that he needs to stop saying things like that and he replied" I'm just joking. " sometimes he says them in a joking manner but in my mind I'm thinking, who jokes like that with his own child? I love him but he says things to me in such a degrading way. my self esteem is shot i want to leave but I don't even have a job right now so I can't leave him, but I don't want to subject myself to this abuse for myself or my son...
Any advice?
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  #2  
Old September 23rd, 2013, 06:47 PM
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Re: Husband verbally abusive?!

You already know that your husband is verbally abusing you and your son. You know that's meant to be intimidating and that it's not funny. That's the first step.

Now you have to confront it. Tell him to stop talking to you and/or your son that way and have some consequence to back it up. For example, if he continues to use those words after you have asked him to stop, leave the room or whatever setting you are in until he can speak to you in a more respectful manner.

If he does not change, or worse, if the abuse escalates past verbal abuse, see the help of a professional. You may want to work on an exit plan now.

If he already abuses you or your son physically, please call the National Abuse Hotline at 1−800−799−SAFE or go to www.thehotline.org.
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Old September 26th, 2013, 05:55 AM
dawris dawris is offline
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Re: Husband verbally abusive?!

Horrendous. You cannot allow him to treat you and your son in that way. Just out of interest...after being married for 6 years, has your husband always been this way? Or is it a more recent development? I would second the suggestion by Lucy to leave the room. Actually, leave the house with your son for an afternoon or longer. Even if he gets through this, your son will grow up using this language. It is a bad situation on many levels requiring a solution.
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Old September 26th, 2013, 06:16 AM
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Re: Husband verbally abusive?!

That's sad... A father being verbally abusive to his own child. His son is at a developmental stage of his life and will continue for many, many years. I hate it... His own father is literally destroying that young boys self image, confidence, esteem, teaching him the wrong things about being loved and love itself. He's teaching him how to be abusive, disrespectful and cruel.

If only that man would realize that children at that age could be taught so many good things through love and encouragement he would be able to watch this own son grow into his own with plenty of self confidence, happiness, respect and love for both his parents.

I've had the joy of being very active in my own grandchildrens lives. Watching those young personalities develop into their own person. All of them are loving, respectful and have plenty of confidence.

Life is too short... Now is the time to act before it's too late. That man - bully; needs to be told his behavior is not acceptable. I pray he's not physically abusive to either of you. If he is, you need to get out someway somehow. I'm sorry for the situation you're in. It's not good. Not good at all.
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Old October 14th, 2013, 10:17 AM
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Re: Husband verbally abusive?!

I would like to say don't make excuses for that man's evil.

Get help. Professional counseling. For your son and for you. Catholic Charities helped me immensely and did not charge much. I have been unemployed for a long time.

She helped me realize how much my husband had emotionally abused our kids and me and the steps I needed to take.

The best of luck to you and prayers being said for your son. He is the innocent. There is no reason to be called any name by a parent. NONE.

In some schools when children do it, it is called BULLYING and is NOT tolerated.

I do hope you find a way to resolve this before your child internalizes and really begins to suffer.
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Old March 2nd, 2014, 12:01 AM
finatina finatina is offline
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Re: Husband verbally abusive?!

I wonder if you could video tap him and show him who he is and how he really acts and talks to youguys. Just a thought.
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Old March 2nd, 2014, 04:34 AM
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Swiss140 Swiss140 is offline
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Re: Husband verbally abusive?!

I am very sorry you are going through this, it breaks my heart to hear that our husband is treating his son (and you) that way. My personal though is to get out, go stay with a parent, relative or goof friend. But if this is a recent development then you have to tell him that his talking that way is unacceptable. Like has been said above you need to have some exit plan, no one should have to go through what you are.
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Old March 2nd, 2014, 06:43 AM
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Re: Husband verbally abusive?!

This thread is over 5 months old & sadly the OP hasn't returned after her ordinal post.
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Old March 2nd, 2014, 09:30 AM
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Swiss140 Swiss140 is offline
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Re: Husband verbally abusive?!

Quote:
Originally Posted by snafu View Post
This thread is over 5 months old & sadly the OP hasn't returned after her ordinal post.
Opps I guess I should of looked at the date
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Old March 3rd, 2014, 12:16 AM
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Re: Husband verbally abusive?!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Swiss140 View Post
Opps I guess I should of looked at the date
But someone else who is in the same situation as the OP might read what you have written and take action though!
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