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  #21  
Old October 21st, 2013, 09:22 AM
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Re: After six years, he tells me he is not divorced...

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Originally Posted by snafu View Post
hey - it took me 5 years after ex & I split/divorced before I started dating again.

Take the time you need to heal (I also had a 3 date rule - no more than three dates with a guy that way no one gets hurt/too atached. I broke that rule for now DH)
Finally found a decent guy then. Good for you.
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  #22  
Old October 24th, 2013, 04:43 PM
campfirefly campfirefly is offline
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Re: After six years, he tells me he is not divorced...

Ironic you guys should bring up the stages of grief...

First, I lost my husband and eldest son in an accident. I am intimately familiar with the stages of grief.

Second, since I've earned a master's degree in counseling. So, I'm also educated on the subject.

GRRRRR....He feels badly for making me sad and angry, but right now, that is not enough.

Creating a plan B and following the money...

Thank you all for being so supportive!
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  #23  
Old October 24th, 2013, 09:16 PM
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Re: After six years, he tells me he is not divorced...

Please keep coming back and giving updates! We're rooting for you!
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  #24  
Old October 25th, 2013, 07:29 AM
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Re: After six years, he tells me he is not divorced...

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Originally Posted by campfirefly View Post
GRRRRR....He feels badly for making me sad and angry, but right now, that is not enough.

Of course he does. He had a good thing going until he got caught.
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  #25  
Old October 25th, 2013, 05:12 PM
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Re: After six years, he tells me he is not divorced...





just my


more (((hugs)))


I once accidently went out a married guy a couple times - as soon as I figured it out Ididn't talk to him again.
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  #26  
Old March 12th, 2016, 02:45 AM
campfirefly campfirefly is offline
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Re: After six years, he tells me he is not divorced...

UPDATE...

Well, it has been about 2.5 years since I first posted; yes, it took that long to step away. The house has not sold yet and the waiting was taking a toll on my heath. So, now I type from my temporary rental.

- The first issues was that the house has not sold in all this time. So, my investment is tied up. I really did not want to leave the property with that kind of money involved.

- He has not filed for divorce yet. When asked, he would show me the paperwork, tell me about the upcoming appointment with the attorney, etc. I have friends with contested divorces that were "free" after seven months. Since we split, he wrote that he had a few reasons why he didn't want to get divorced (news to me), but they were not strong enough to lose me (wow),

- The break-up happened because I said I would not move on with after the house sold if he were still married. We had a positive offer on the house (since, it fell through), and he asked why I was not sharing his search for a new place. I reminded him that I would not be moving on. With that, I was then firmly pushed out of the the house.

He does not want to see me (too painful), hear from me (too painful), nor has he made any indication that he wants me back (???).

So, it seems I am no better off than if I had walked out back when I first wrote this. Although I would have moved on to a much smaller house, I would have been able to live my life without such turmoil. I sleep better, I eat better and I haven't had any headaches since I left. I did hope for the best, but I had a feeling this would be how it would end.
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  #27  
Old March 12th, 2016, 03:34 AM
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Re: After six years, he tells me he is not divorced...

Thank you for the update.

While it may have taken time to move on, you probably needed that time to be sure about what you're doing. It seems you've given him enough time, too, to either be the great guy you thought him to be, or to prove himself a schmuck. That's not necessarily time wasted.

I hope you get your money back, but your health is already improving! Take care of yourself.
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  #28  
Old March 12th, 2016, 10:07 AM
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KayKay KayKay is offline
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Re: After six years, he tells me he is not divorced...

campfirefly,

Thank you for coming back to update. It has most certainly been a long, painful 2.5 years for you. But even so that is SO much better than if you were still with him. I'm so sorry.

Have you spoken with a lawyer about how to get out of your obligation on the house? To be honest? With his history, it wouldn't surprise me if your ex has another woman naively living there in the same situation you were in. Do you have reason to suspect that?
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  #29  
Old March 17th, 2016, 09:46 PM
karimakkan karimakkan is offline
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Re: After six years, he tells me he is not divorced...

hi.. really sorry about this. Why are they not divorced? Is there any other problem that irritates him?
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  #30  
Old March 19th, 2016, 11:37 AM
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Re: After six years, he tells me he is not divorced...

What an ordeal you have been through. You are so strong.
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