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  #21  
Old February 25th, 2008, 07:41 PM
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Another Disheartened DIL Another Disheartened DIL is offline
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Re: Gender War

WHY MEN SHOULD NEVER BE DEPRESSED:

Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.
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  #22  
Old February 26th, 2008, 07:16 PM
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latelearner latelearner is offline
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Re: Gender War

I love it! Thanks for the laugh tonight, it was needed!
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  #23  
Old February 27th, 2008, 03:24 PM
Potato Head Potato Head is offline
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Re: Gender War

Quote:
Originally Posted by Another Disheartened DIL View Post
WHY MEN SHOULD NEVER BE DEPRESSED:

Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.
If a guy can be so happy with things so simple, why do women take things that are just as simple and never become satisfied?
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  #24  
Old February 27th, 2008, 05:20 PM
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KayKay KayKay is offline
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Re: Gender War

Well, I'm not sure this really belongs here, but it's one of my all-time faves:


Ad posted in a Utah newspaper.
Post Date: Aug 7th, 2006
Expire Date: Sep 6th, 2006

$10,000 06' Suzuki GSXR 1000
Farmington, UT 84025
2006 Suzuki 1000. This bike is perfect! It has 1000 miles and has had
its 500 mile dealer service. (Expensive) It's been adult ridden, all
wheels have always been on the ground. I use it as a cruiser/commuter.
I'm selling it because it was purchased without proper consent of a
loving wife. Apparently "do whatever the f*** you want" doesn't mean
what I thought. Call me, Steve. (801) XXX-XXXX
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  #25  
Old February 27th, 2008, 07:30 PM
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elaine elaine is offline
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Re: Gender War

Quote:
Originally Posted by Potato Head View Post
If a guy can be so happy with things so simple, why do women take things that are just as simple and never become satisfied?
Can you give an example? What do you mean?
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  #26  
Old February 27th, 2008, 09:01 PM
Potato Head Potato Head is offline
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Re: Gender War

Quote:
Originally Posted by elaine View Post
Can you give an example? What do you mean?
-The world is your urinal.
-You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
-One mood all the time.
-A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
-If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
-Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
-The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
-You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.
- You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

And that's just a few things listed in the above.


Come to think of it, men do have it easier than women. Sorry, ladies.
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  #27  
Old February 27th, 2008, 09:29 PM
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KayKay KayKay is offline
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Re: Gender War

I tried copying this but it wouldn't cut and paste, so I'm posting a link.

Hope that's okay...

http://bertc.com/womansBrain.htm


Hee hee hee...
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  #28  
Old February 27th, 2008, 09:45 PM
Another Disheartened DIL's Avatar
Another Disheartened DIL Another Disheartened DIL is offline
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Re: Gender War

No wonder I want to pull my hair out at times! That's a good one KayKay.
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I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
~Rita Rudner
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  #29  
Old May 21st, 2008, 12:38 PM
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Re: Gender War

...can't...... stop......laughing
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  #30  
Old August 8th, 2009, 10:28 PM
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snafu snafu is offline
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Re: Gender War

its not fair, men going become distinguished; women going gray = looking older
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