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  #1  
Old November 25th, 2018, 04:28 AM
mary40 mary40 is offline
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Hot and Cold Friend

Ive been best friends with this girl for almost 2 years now. Our friendship has always been very close and we tell each other everything. Recently however, I am getting the feeling she's getting bored of me. She does have phases when she's very affectionate and then phases when she's more distant. But recently its like she's not even excited to see me anymore. If we hang out with mutual friends she's all chatty and funny and then when were alone she goes quiet and doesn't really initiate any conversation and seems bored with what I'm saying. She's showing more affection to all of our mutual friends than to me. Im telling myself that its because Im the closest one to her and she's just being her most natural self. But more often than not I'm leaving with really negative feelings. Then she says stuff like you're my best friend ever, I would never find anyone like you blablabla, but her actions just leave me feeling confused. Ive tried keeping a distance to give her space but its hurting me. And she keeps telling me how she loves so and so girl so much, Im starting to have the feeling she wants to get closer to her coz she got bored of me. I should add that we have work together so she does have material benefits to stay friends with me. I just feel something isn't right anymore.
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Old November 25th, 2018, 04:30 AM
mary40 mary40 is offline
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Re: Hot and Cold Friend

i should add that she's the kind of person who hates discussing these kinds of issues so confronting her about the subject would only make things worse.
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Old November 25th, 2018, 06:50 AM
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LucyVanPelt LucyVanPelt is offline
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Re: Hot and Cold Friend

Giving her space is the right thing to do. It's hurting you right now because you miss her, and because you are not filling that space with other people and activities. So, change the story. Rather than think, "I'm giving her space because she's bored of me," think, "I'm trying this new thing with new people and growing as an individual."

ALL relationships go through that ebb and flow. Learning how to manage the tide will help your relationships last.

Good luck!
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Old November 26th, 2018, 05:52 PM
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snafu snafu is offline
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Re: Hot and Cold Friend

Hugs
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